Monday, April 19, 2004

Mixing All the Metaphors

This past month and a half or so has been one of the toughest of my entire life. I've been trying and trying to pull myself free of the damn creeping vines that have been tieing me down. Everyone has had advice: Be patient. Give it time. You don't know what you really want yet. Don't act in haste.
You know what? No one giving that advice is me. No one knows the decisions my heart has already made. I spent years putting up with nonsense I never should have put up with in the first place and never said anything about it to anyone. At 39 years old I believe it is about time I listen to myself first and take all the advice as the good intentions of people who care about me and want me to be happy. I've been doing the hard work, asking myself the tough questions and facing up to a lot of things I stuffed down for years. Looks like it may finally be starting to pay off. I'm going to look at an apartment in the neighborhood that sounds like it very well could be the perfect place to make my new home and my new life. I feel like I've been revving my engine in neutral forever and I'm finally starting to shift into drive. Not an automatic mind you, but a manual transmission. Planning on going from neutral to first, not 0 to 60 in a blink of an eye.

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